Wedding Ceremony Before Wedding Reception

by Judy
(Essex County, NJ)

My daughter doesn't like being the center of attention, and she is uncomfortable with the thought of 175 people watching her get married. We have a traditional 5-hour wedding reception planned.

Is there a way that she can get married right before the guests arrive and then we proceed with the party? How could we make that work? Also, if we did, how should we word the invitation?

Our Thoughts

Congratulations on your daughters wedding! I know this seems like an overwhelming question, but the answer is rather simple.

If your daughter is truly that uncomfortable getting married in front of people, have your daughter get married privately prior to the beginning of the cocktail hour with immediate family or a small number of selective guests of her choosing.

You can send out a small number of wedding invitations that would include a start time for the private wedding ceremony, along with wording that states that the wedding reception will be immediately following afterward. You then can send out a second wedding invitations to the majority of your guests inviting them to join the bride, groom and their family at the wedding reception to honor their big day, giving the call time for the start of the cocktail hour.

Always keep in mind that this is her big day and however you and her choose to design the wedding timeline will be completely alright with everyone else. People that truly know her will understand and respect her decision.

So enjoy the day and I am sure that everyone will enjoy the big party afterwards!

Regards,
Danielle

Wedding Ceremony and Reception on Different Days

by Katherine
(Ohio)

Is it OK to have our wedding ceremony and wedding reception on two different days? My fiance and I are contemplating having our religious ceremony on a Friday and then our reception 4 hours away on Saturday.

How can I make this work? Do I invite everyone to both events? Do I need to have a commitment ceremony at the reception location? Can I wear the same dress?

Our Thoughts
Katherine,

There are a few options here. First, do you want to invite everyone to both the ceremony and reception?

Our recommendation would be to plan on inviting everyone to the reception. As a courtesy you can invite everyone to the ceremony, however reality is that most people probably will only attend the reception due to the ceremony being on a Friday and quite a distance from the reception.

It is not necessary to have another commitment ceremony at your reception unless that is something you really want to do. This can almost be treated like a destination wedding. Couples often have a post wedding reception after they get married for their friends and family at home.

You can definitely wear the same dress since most of your guests will not see you until your reception. Save the money you would have spent on another dress and use it for other things you have to pay for.

To your wedding!
Danielle & Stephen

Wedding Ceremony and Reception Locations

by Victoria
(New Jersey)

Is it stupid to have a Wedding Ceremony then have the Reception at a later date? I am confused.

Well I don't have a ring yet but we have made a mutual decision to get married. He is searching for my ring now and he says I will be getting it soon. But I just want to get your input on this question. Please help me.

Our Thoughts

Congratulations on your soon-to-be engagement! It will be such an exciting time for you both and the only stupid question is the one not asked, so thank you for sending your question our way. That is what we are here for.

You can definitely hold a wedding ceremony on one date and have the wedding reception set for a later date if this is the way you envision your big day. Many couples choose to take this route for many different reasons.

There are many reasons and circumstances that may lead you to having your ceremony on a completely different day than your wedding reception. Those reasons can be anything from financial concerns to relocation and everything in between.

What ever the reason, create your wedding day as you truly see it. Just make sure to enjoy every minute!

Regards,
Danielle

Wedding Ceremony Invitation

How do I invite guest to the wedding ceremony but not the reception? What are my options, and how should I word my invitations for the guest invited to the ceremony only?

Our Thoughts

I know this may seem like a complicated issue, but there is a very simple solution. Guests that are invited to the ceremony only would get an invitation that contained only the wedding ceremony information printed on it.

Guests that are invited to both the ceremony and the wedding reception would receive an invitation with the ceremony information on it along with the "reception to follow" information included as well.

Regards,
Danielle

Forest Wedding Ceremony Location

by Anthony Hernandez
(San Bernardino, CA)

Hi,

We are looking for a forest background for our wedding ceremony. We have been looking around and found a few places.

These places are either not that nice of a background or really costly. My question is if it would be better to try and find a location of my own and rent the things I need and have them setup on location?

A location not at a venue but in an open space with a beautiful forest background that we are looking for. We plan on having no more then 100 people attending the wedding ceremony.

Our Thoughts

You hit the nail on the head as some would say! I would definitely go and look locally for a beautiful location to hold your wedding ceremony, preferably near where your main reception will be held.

Start by looking at local state parks, arboretums, camp grounds - do not laugh they have some great scenery - even local wineries or nurseries. You will be amazed what is out there and available for a small donation or fee for a couple of hours.

Always make sure of your assigned times of use, and if you require a mic or music make sure there are electrical outlets that you are allowed to use.

Good luck and have fun on the hunt! It is the best part of planning!

Regards,
Danielle

Children in Wedding Ceremony

by Nancy

How can children be involved in a wedding ceremony? My daughter is getting married and the groom has 11 nieces and nephews on his side of the family. On the bride side there are 8 little ones. My daughter loves children and wants to have them at the wedding. We have just about decided on 3 little girls for flower girls and 1 for the ring bearer. We have thought about having the rest ring a bell to begin the ceremony and then go sit with their parents. Can you think of any way that we could include the others so they wont get their feeling hurt?

Out Thoughts
Nancy,

We actually just recently helped a couple with this same situation when we planned their wedding.

They chose to have all the children come up to the altar during the ceremony, and the pastor said a prayer while the kids surrounded them. The children then returned to their seats for the rest of the ceremony.

While this example was religious, it doesn't have to be. Your idea of the bell ringing is a good one as well.

Prior to the wedding your daughter can tell all the children that she would like them to be involved in her special day or perhaps send them a special invitation. She can also request that they wear colors (dresses, shirts, etc.) that match her wedding colors to make it feel like they are really part of the event.

Additional ideas include having the older children act as ushers and seat guests as they arrive and having one or two children read a poem or passage during the ceremony.

To Your Wedding!
Danielle & Stephen