Second Wedding Receptions

My fiancé and I live in 2 different states. Due to health, and family commitments it seems some people may not be able to travel for a wedding.

Ideally, I would only like to have one wedding, but it seems impossible to suit everyone! So it seems we may have to have two weddings. I don't want to get married without my friends and family in front of a whole group of people I hardly know. Any suggestions?



Our Thoughts

This is a situation that many couples are faced with, so try to take a deep breath and even a martini if needed :)

The way we typically see this issue resolved is by having one main, traditional wedding day. This includes everything from your ceremony through a traditional reception.

Then, a second wedding reception is planned for the second location. This typically consists of just the reception and can include food, entertainment and even a photographer if you want.

It should almost be handled as if you are having a destination wedding. How far apart are the two states? Would it be possible to have your wedding somewhere in between?

The challenging part is deciding where to have the full wedding and where to have the second wedding reception. The bottom line is that you will probably not please everyone, and you have to do what is best for both of you. Remember, this is your wedding!

If you truly can’t pick just one location for your full wedding, the other choice is two full weddings in different locations.

If you choose this route, be aware that your expenses will double as well as the time and effort needed to pull this all together. However you choose to handle it, you may want to hire a wedding planner to help and lessen the stress involved.

To Your Wedding!
Danielle & Stephen

Second Wedding Celebration

by Linda
(Canada)

Is it okay to have a small family wedding at home (30 people) and then get remarried in Mexico (that is where my daughter really wants to get married)?

But, we have elderly family members that can’t go to the second wedding in Mexico.

Also, is it ok for her to get remarried in Mexico in the same dress (I think that is fine) with probably even fewer people?

She wants pictures on the beach with her wedding dress.

Our Thoughts

Linda,

Congratulations on your daughter's wedding! What fun it is to plan not one, but two weddings. And in Mexico!

I am a little partial since my husband and I had a destination wedding event in the Dominican Republic...so much fun!

It is very common for couples to have a destination wedding and then have a second wedding reception celebration at home for those friends and relatives that can’t make the trip. So, to answer your question yes it is OK.

Also, I do not see anything wrong with using the same wedding dress for both weddings. If she is self conscious about this fact, she could always purchase a less formal and more fun gown for the beach wedding itself, but I do not think it is necessary.

If she does choose to go with a second dress, she could also bring along her more formal gown and switch into it for photos on the beach too.

I had a client bring her more formal dress to her second destination wedding event and though she had purchased a second more informal dress, she took photos in her formal wedding gown because she loved it so much.

The photos came out amazing, and she got really crazy and wore the dress right into the surf which made for an unbelievable photo shoot!

How much fun is it to be able to wear "the dress" not once, but twice? I wish I had this dilemma! Have a fantastic time at both weddings.

Regards,
Danielle

Wedding Dress For Second Wedding

I'm the bride getting married in January 2011. Can I wear a silver/grey Jovani Gown?

I'm 46 and this is my second marriage, so I thought I would be different. What do you think?

Our Thoughts

I think you should wear what ever you think will make you the happiest bride on your BIG day! I am all for doing something different, and I do not think age and number of marriages should be a factor on such an important day of your life.

Go and enjoy your dress of choice! The colors sound perfect for that time of year, just gorgeous! Send us a photo of you in your gown if you can - it sounds amazing!

Regards,
Danielle

Our Second Wedding

by Jing
(Manhattan, Kansas)

My husband and I have been married for two years but didn't really have a wedding ceremony. It was just me and him and a few family members.

We have been through so much within the past two years and we would really like to recommit with a second wedding. Is this worth doing, and can I have a ceremony with bridesmaids and walk down the isle?



Our Thoughts

Dear Jing,

I am so happy for you both, especially since you have really stuck it out over the last two years of hardships.

Marriage can be a crazy ride and I am all for celebrating a re-commitment by hosting a renewal or second wedding event. I do hope you GO BIG and celebrate the way you both want to and really enjoy your day.

Congratulations!

Regards,
Danielle

Second Wedding Reception For Son

My son and daughter-in-law were married in Bogata, Columbia a year ago by a judge so she could apply for a visa. They arrived here last July.

I realize it is late but we would like to hold something in their honor to meet friends a family. What would we call it? How do we go about it and what is the proper etiquette?

Our Thoughts

Congratulations on their marriage, and what an exciting wedding destination!

What a wonderful gesture to honor their marriage, regardless of whether it was last month or last year. Your options are endless here.

Hosting an event in their honor can simply be called a marriage or wedding celebration event, post-wedding party or you can go grand and host a post or recent marriage cocktail reception. It all comes down to who they are as a couple and what your budget can handle.

A lot of couples have a small renewal of their vows at the event or they show the video, if any, at the event to relive their special moment with their friends and family who may not have been with them for the real deal.

You can have a small wedding cake for them to cut and even hire a photographer for the day to record all the new memories. There is no wrong way to honor your son and new daughter - just the thought is so touching. They are very blessed with not only each other, but with a wonderful set of parents.

Regards,
Danielle

Second Wedding Reception

by Vicki
(Littleton, CO)

My son and future daughter are planning a small wedding. We have a very large family and many friends.

Is it right to give a pre wedding reception and invite all the people who won't be invited to the wedding?

Our Thoughts

Throwing a pre-wedding reception is a very nice gesture, especially since it sounds like there will be many people who care about your son and his fiancé that won’t be able to attend the wedding.

There really isn’t any etiquette around this, but it is very common for couples to have either a pre-wedding reception or a post wedding reception. For example, destination weddings are very popular, and couples often have a second wedding reception for guests that couldn’t make it to their wedding.

Whether to have a pre or post wedding reception really depends on the preferences of the couple, availability of a majority of the guests and availability of reception locations.

To Your Wedding!
Danielle & Stephen

Second Wedding Bridal Shower

by Shelley
(Missouri)

My nephew is having a second wedding (it is the bride's first wedding). I hosted a shower for the first wedding, is it necessary to host another shower for the second wedding?

Our Thoughts

Dear Shelley,

It is so wonderful that your nephew has an Aunt as generous as you, what a blessing.

If you are going down the traditional route for any wedding regarding bridal showers, it is traditional for the bride’s parents and/or their wedding party to host the wedding shower for the bride and/or couple.

If the bridal couple does not have anyone but you to host the bridal shower, then maybe you can sit them down and share with them a budget that you have in mind. It is OK to ask for financial help, especially if they are thinking something bigger than what you can afford.

Since it is your nephew’s second wedding, he needs to understand your concerns. I would think anything you can offer to help with will again be such a blessing to them both.

Regards,
Danielle

Second Wedding

Is it alright to have a wedding after you had a marriage in a court house and are now a widow for more than thirty years?




Our Thoughts

The answer to this is absolutely! There is no better time to celebrate something so joyful and positive.

This reminds me of one of my favorite bridal couples. The bride had been a widow for at least 10 years and the groom had been divorced for almost 20.

They were about to retire, and they had similar concerns about having a wedding. Their event was tastefully done, nothing too over the top, but it was so elegant, sophisticated and most importantly so much fun for everyone involved.

It was such a pleasure to know that after such a long time being alone and through all their adversities that these two people found each other. I hope you kick off your heels and enjoy every minute! You both deserve it!

Regards,
Danielle

Second Wedding Gift

Our friend recently got married for the second time and we could not attend the wedding. Normally for a first marriage, I would send a wedding gift. But for a second marriage I did not even attend, am I still obligated to send a gift?


Our Thoughts

If the wedding invitation came from a good friend, which I am assuming it did or else you would not have been invited to their second wedding, it is still proper etiquette to send a wedding gift in your absence.

It is a new relationship and celebration and they both thought so much of you that you were included on their big day, so yes send them a little something to make them feel special. It is the right thing to do.

Regards,
Danielle